With well over 300 locations spanning seven western states, dutch bros near me has expanded into a veritable caffeination empire since opening in 1992. The chain’s drive-thru kiosks are nearly as ubiquitous in the Pacific NW as pine trees and outdated “Bernie or Bust” bumper stickers.

Dutch Bros functions as the antithesis to the bougie coffee culture from the region that spawned it. Due to its preference for chatty baristas, flavored syrups, and loud pop music, most “serious” coffee people have distanced themselves looking at the colorful, sugary wares, discounting the chain being a hybrid of a Starbucks drive-thru and Abercrombie & Fitch at its pre-Jersey Shore cultural apex.

The Grants Pass, Oregon-based brand is undoubtedly unapologetic about employing young, effusive, and spiky-haired “broistas” (their term!) named Tanner rather than mumbly, Aeropress-obsessed beardos who can’t possibly be paid enough to do something like they care (full disclosure: that’s me!). But it’s about time the coffee-drinking people of America shed the notion that Dutch Bros’ intense experiments with sugar and caffeine are for the boorish and unsophisticated and accept it as being what exactly it is: the In-N-From the coffee world, including an extensive secret menu and cultish regional following.

That secret menu — that is so “secret” that employees have corporate-approved printouts on hand to decode it — is a rolling database, with fan-favorite concoctions added every month. The truth is so massive, it makes In-N-Out’s secret/not-secret menu appear to be White Castle. With everything else from lattes to milkshakes to blended energy drink-based beverages on offer, the secret menu at Dutch Bros is a stunning display of all things there is to love about the place.

But it’s… a great deal. For the greatest of the dozens-deep offerings, we approached a Dutch Bros barista in Portland just to walk us through a greatest-hits lineup of drinks that span a broad spectrum of flavors, temperatures, and textures, developing a perfect jumping-off point for anyone who’s willing to hit up their nearest Dutch Bros and roll the dice on something wild and weird. Without further ado, listed here are 14 secret menu drinks that are guaranteed to obtain jacked at Dutch Bros.

White Coffee Cookie – What’s inside it: White chocolate sauce, chocolate macadamia nut syrup, white espresso, and breve

Those seeking a drink that’s sweet, nutty, and balanced will like the White Coffee Cookie. The white espresso works perfectly with all the breve because of the syrups, resulting in a drink that’s creamy, earthy, and merely rich enough to appeal to a wide variety of palates.

The Nutty Irishman – That’s inside it: Nitro cold brew, Irish cream and hazelnut syrups, and cream

Nitro cold brew is impossibly hip at the moment, and today that Dutch Bros brews and cans their own, the sky’s the limit for drinks which use it as a strong and frothy base. The Nutty Irishman is quite basic — just a couple yhzhzu combined with cream along with a whole can of cold brew on ice — so go ahead and make your own spinoff if you’re hoping to get completely spun off frosty cold caffeine.

Double Rainbro – What’s inside it: Strawberry, peach, and coconut syrups along with a can of Rebel energy drink over ice

Determined to not be outclassed by Monster Energy and the like, in 2012 http://menu.dutchbros.com/ unleashed Rebel, their home type of energy drink. Employees started tinkering by using it immediately, and the Double Rainbro quickly emerged as being an off-menu favorite that tastes a lot like something the Beach Boys would’ve sipped on through the pool within their 1988 hit “Kokomo.” Sadly, it contains no rum, but once it leaves the property there’s no one stopping you against upgrading it using a mini bottle of Captain Morgan.

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